Cara Delevingne Killed My Pet Ant…

21 Jun

I’m no stranger to the peculiar rambles of the subconscious mind – pretty much every morning I wake confused by the seemingly real and just darned weird experiences my dreams play out for me.


Last night – I had a pet ant, which I loved more than anything in the world (the ant I guess was representing my beloved Doxie, Dash – and Ant? Well, every evening we have a house full of large plodhopping, dozy, friendly ants wandering around – it’s just that time of year).


So what did Cara Delevingne do?

Well, for fear of losing my beloved pet ant (this was surely brought on by the sickening news that dog-napping is happening more and more frequently in Dubai, and the thought of anyone stealing Dash is simply abhorrent!) I had placed my pet ant in a tea cup with a few leaves to munch on. Cara, innocently, thought the ant would be thirsty and cold, so she poured in some water and set the cup under a bright lamp. By the time I realised what had happened, the water had boiled from the heat of the lamp and my pet ant had died a terrible death! (Now, don’t think bad of me, but last night I did pour boiling water on a bunch of ants that were busy removing the inside of my house wall!)

cara delevingne

Why Cara? I have no idea – no reason for her to be in my mind… maybe she too is an ant-killer and we were subconsciously united across the macrocosm.

Do I feel bad for boiling ants? I do, I do! But there are so many, and they really are causing damage – the inside of the wall is starting to collapse! Pouring cinnamon on their heads is painless and effective – but they just come back (why do ants hate cinnamon so much?! But they really do.) And the great thing about killing ants… by the morning all evidence is gone. They clear up their own dead bodies… but what do they do with them?

K x


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